CHRISTmas

We had a great Christmas Eve and Christmas Day! On Christmas Eve we went to my parents house and had dinner and we were able to just spend sometime together. We opened gifts and let Sydney get some energy out before we headed home. Mike and I opened our small gifts to each other that night. Mike got me the newest Hanson CD which I really wanted and he also got me a few small things from Bath and Body works. I got Mike a video game that he really wanted but I really can not tell you much about it because I really do not play XBOX 360.

Christmas day we went to Mike's moms for a wonderful lunch and opened gifts again! Sydney got a few clothes and PJ's. Backyardigans bath toys and some things to play with when we leave tomorrow for San Francisco. I got an awesome sweatshirt but its the wrong size so I am going to have to return it. So hopefully they will have it in my size, I also got a Amex gift card that I will be using in SF. Mike got a few things too but I am not sure what all he got. I know that he got a watch, sweatshirt, and some other stuff. We had a great time with eachother!

It's amazing to me that Christ was born so that He could end up paying the ransom for me! I can not believe that He did it for me and I will never be able to comprehend it but I am forever grateful and Thankful!!!

Tomorrow we leave bright an early (5:45am) to San Francisco for a VACATION with my parents. So until we get back take care, and I hope that you all had a Very Merry Christmas!

I can breathe for the moment!

We had a little bit of a scare this weekend but thankfully, by the grace of God everything is perfect right now! I got an ultrasound done on Saturday and everything was looking good and then today I went in for another one and everything again looks perfect. I can actually breathe for the first time in 12 weeks. I got some beautiful pictures of our little peanut, and as of right now all I can do is thank God for this little miracle and feel blessed that we get to bring another little one into our family! Here are a few pictures from the ultrasound today.

Lisa, Thanks so much for being the one to talk me while I am freaking out, or just worrying along with me :) I would not have been able to get though this past weekend without you! Maybe a walk on Hale street will help out next time I freak out :)

Blessing...along with total fear!

Yesterday I was 12 weeks which is a totally blessing from God but also at the same time I still have so much fear that I need to give up to God and understand that He is in control over everything that happens.

The past few days I have totally been struggling with thoughts about losing this little baby. I have no idea what triggered these thoughts, but I have them all the time. I know that thoughts like this come along with multiple miscarriages, but I thought that I was handling them pretty well. I can not wait for my ultrasound next Monday but at the same time I don't want to go because I am so scared that they are going to tell me that there is no heartbeat, I don't want to deal with that again! I know that I need to embrace this pregnancy and I am going to try but at the same time it is so hard to do. I have this journal that I wrote in when I was pregnant with Sydney and I still write in it. I want to give it to her when she gets older. Anyways, I did this with the baby that we lost in March. I wrote it it everyday for 13 weeks until we lost the baby...after I lost the baby I threw it away I could not even look at it. Now I am 12 weeks and I still can not write in the journal that I have for this little one...and I have no idea when I will be comfortable doing it. 

Again I just want you to know that I am extremely excited about this little one...I just have some fear that comes along with it. And thank-you to those you have been there for me everyday during this pregnancy, I have no idea what I would do without you!!

Nothing new!

Well, not much is new around the Marinello's household. Thanksgiving was good, we great I guess nothing went wrong and we all had a good time so that was nice. We spent Thanksgiving day at Mike's moms house all day and Mike got to see some of his cousins which he only see during the holidays so it was nice to catch up with them.

On Thursday night my parents took Sydney over night and Mike and I were able to go out on Black Friday...even though we don't have any money to spend it was kinda fun to go out. We did find a few good deals and got some Christmas shopping done for the family.

Sunday was my side of the families Thanksgiving. We spent that over at my parents house, so I was officially done with the turkey!

I have no pictures to post because I was a dork and did not take any but there is nothing I can do about it now :)

I was officially 11 weeks yesterday which is a total blessing but still has not taken the anxiety away yet. Not sure when I will stop worrying about it but, eventually it shall get easier! Prayers are welcome.